Quotes about seeking professional help
Betty, born 1924
I went to a psychiatrist. I decided this was not any kind of life. It was obviously unacceptable. If a person had ambition, they were not going to get anyplace with this lifestyle. The psychiatrist said, "What did you plan to do instead?" I said, "Well, there aren't too many options, are there? You can be celibate or you can be married."
Sandy, born 1935
A friend recommended a therapist. I went to her and she said, "What seems to be the problem?" And I said, "I'm gay and I want to be straight." Couldn't use the word lesbian. She said, "Well, I don't think you've ever talked about trust or love, Sandy. Let's talk about love and trust, and then let's see which side of the fence you jump on." That hooked me in. I was totally hooked. I knew I was going to be going to her. I worked a job and a half to be able to pay for my therapy. At the end of that two years, I never looked at another man, I accepted my lesbianism totally. And I was a free woman.
A friend recommended a therapist. I went to her and she said, "What seems to be the problem?" And I said, "I'm gay and I want to be straight." Couldn't use the word lesbian. She said, "Well, I don't think you've ever talked about trust or love, Sandy. Let's talk about love and trust, and then let's see which side of the fence you jump on." That hooked me in. I was totally hooked. I knew I was going to be going to her. I worked a job and a half to be able to pay for my therapy. At the end of that two years, I never looked at another man, I accepted my lesbianism totally. And I was a free woman.
Joyce, born 1933
I was having a really hard time just trying to take care of these three kids. I was pretty, pretty depressed. The first thing the psychiatrist says to me was, “I think you’re having a struggle with your sexual identity.” It was so off the chart for me that I had no idea what he was saying to me. I think, in retrospect, it wasn’t that far back in psychoanalytic thinking that women who rejected and had difficulty with being a mother and taking care of children, they were the queer women. But I had no idea of that. I was there for some help and when he said that I really almost fell off the chair.
I was having a really hard time just trying to take care of these three kids. I was pretty, pretty depressed. The first thing the psychiatrist says to me was, “I think you’re having a struggle with your sexual identity.” It was so off the chart for me that I had no idea what he was saying to me. I think, in retrospect, it wasn’t that far back in psychoanalytic thinking that women who rejected and had difficulty with being a mother and taking care of children, they were the queer women. But I had no idea of that. I was there for some help and when he said that I really almost fell off the chair.
Anonymous, born 1936
I found myself a therapist who was a lesbian and feminist who really helped me understand what was going on, once I got beyond the stage of thinking I was sick. I believed what I had been told, that if you're a homosexual, you are mentally ill. But I had no evidence of my mental illness. Once I got to that point where I realized that it wasn't true, that what I was was me, and that it was right… from my first sexual experience, I felt like this is what I am supposed to be. This is what's been missing in my life. I felt whole.
I found myself a therapist who was a lesbian and feminist who really helped me understand what was going on, once I got beyond the stage of thinking I was sick. I believed what I had been told, that if you're a homosexual, you are mentally ill. But I had no evidence of my mental illness. Once I got to that point where I realized that it wasn't true, that what I was was me, and that it was right… from my first sexual experience, I felt like this is what I am supposed to be. This is what's been missing in my life. I felt whole.
Anonymous, born 1933
My brother said he knew a psychologist and if I ever needed help along those lines, to just call. What the hell do you think? Just because I'm lesbian that I'm going to have psychological problems!
My brother said he knew a psychologist and if I ever needed help along those lines, to just call. What the hell do you think? Just because I'm lesbian that I'm going to have psychological problems!
Anonymous, born 1927
The therapist's whole focus was to help me "resolve" my lesbianism by becoming more heterosexual, which, for me, meant I had to learn to keep my secret better.… Lesbianism was, indeed, looked upon by therapists as deviant behavior and, by doctors, as a disease.
The therapist's whole focus was to help me "resolve" my lesbianism by becoming more heterosexual, which, for me, meant I had to learn to keep my secret better.… Lesbianism was, indeed, looked upon by therapists as deviant behavior and, by doctors, as a disease.
Anonymous, born 1938
The therapist asked, "Do you know why you are here?" I looked straight at him and said, "Because I'm a lesbian." This was in 1954, and I don't think I'd ever used that word about myself. [It] was a declaration. That was like, "Leave me alone. This is who I am and don't fuss with me." He said, "You've chosen a very difficult lifestyle, and if you ever want to come back and talk, you're certainly welcome." I was very lucky. I know of people who have gone through shock treatments and things like that.
The therapist asked, "Do you know why you are here?" I looked straight at him and said, "Because I'm a lesbian." This was in 1954, and I don't think I'd ever used that word about myself. [It] was a declaration. That was like, "Leave me alone. This is who I am and don't fuss with me." He said, "You've chosen a very difficult lifestyle, and if you ever want to come back and talk, you're certainly welcome." I was very lucky. I know of people who have gone through shock treatments and things like that.
